Dear Little Liv (A Letter to Jr High Girls)

Hi guys, In addition to this being a post on my blog, it is also a guest post over at Sincerely Rachel Christine. I’m super excited to be a part of this series of guest posts aimed at women and what your heart yearns to tell them. So therefore – I’m only posting part of the letter here. Go HERE to read the rest.

 

 

Today’s post is something I wrote as a letter to myself as I was five years ago, something that I wanted to tell to all the girls that I know and love in my life. My sweet camp and youth group girls mean the world to me and this is my love letter to them. It’s a plea for them to be patient with romance, but also that I’ve been there before and I remember.

Dear Little Liv,

You sat there with your feet dangling out your open window on a warm May night and you cried to yourself, wishing for a man to throw pebbles and sweep you off your feet. You were almost twelve. I wish that the one night could have been the only night you cried in your loneliness, but it wasn’t. There will be many more nights to come.

There will be nights of loneliness – of deep heart aches and longings for boys to notice you and for life just to hurry up so you can find a man. There will be nights of regret – of giving your heart slowly, over time to boys where you realize that things are suddenly complicated and you just lost a friend. There will be nights of deep pondering – ofquestioning intentions and feelings when you’re not sure if you like the attention or are terrified of it. There will be many tears, many racing thoughts, and many desperate prayers.

It sounds daunting, but there are also brilliant days ahead. There will be days of comfort – of realizing that the men in your life are a blessing. There will be days of confidence – of knowing that you did the right thing in a friendship with a boy and seeing the positive results. There will be days of laughter – of getting to be the little sister to the boys around and having their respect. There will be many brilliant days that will in time make up for the tearful nights.

………. Continued here.

The Other Side of Someday

Source: piccsy.com viaOlivia on Pinterest

“I’ll be alright once I find the other side of someday.” The words hit me oddly as I navigated the steering wheel of my mother’s van. Something inside of me identified with the entire Sarah Barellies song, crooning sweetly about the frustration that is “getting over” someone. I smiled to myself, one thought running through my mind. It’s wonderful to be on the other side of someday.

In the moment, time drags on. The pain drags on. You can’t see that there’s another side – or if you can, it seems too far off to really be relevant. Then you have a moment where you look back. You realize that somewhere between the sleepovers with your best friend, tub of chocolate ice cream, and the beautiful feeling that is moving on – the boy that broke your heart seems to be just a memory. Somewhere between the journal entries, endless cups of tea, and open Bible – your depression is replaced by peace.There is another side to someday.

Picture in your mind an awful point in your life. There still is pain. Time doesn’t heal all wounds. But as you get farther away and as you deal with your emotions in a healthy manner, it fades a bit and you realize that you are on the other side of the trial.

Sometimes – someday takes our whole life. Sometimes – someday doesn’t come on earth. Sometimes – someday feels like a fake lie.

It’s real. It’s wonderful. This is from a girl who has fought her mental illnesses of depression and anxiety, with a bit of PTSD on the side. I know what it’s like to be in the bottomless pit, ever falling and spiraling out of control. I’ve cried like a baby over boys before, cursing myself for being dumb. It does get better though. Truly better. There is another side of someday. And maybe it’s not as far off as you may think.

Earning Respect with a Sword

“Are you in?” he asked as he held a nerf battle axe in his hands. I was sitting on the gym floor next to his girlfriend and was a little nervous. I love this kind of stuff, but I’m the only girl that’ll play and I’m going to look like an idiot, but this really does look like fun.
“I’m so in!” I exclaimed as I hopped up and examined the pile of weapons on the floor. My careful selection led me to a long sword – perfect for being a girl fighting against about six college guys. We divvied up into teams of two as I warned the boys that I have brothers – vicious younger brothers. They didn’t quite take me seriously, expecting me to be out in a matter of minutes.
That wasn’t the case.
I fought courageously, bravely, and like a girl. I swung that sword like my life depended on it. It would be cool to be able to say that I was fighting for women everywhere who didn’t think they could wield weapons against stereotypes, but really, I was just having fun. I was revelling in the look on a guy’s face as I managed to kick his butt.
My team of two won the first game. The second was each man for himself and I still managed to hold my own there. The sense of pride and excitement that filled me from participating in this epic nerf battle made me feel like the 21st century Eowyn from Lord of the Rings. What was even better than the feeling in the moment has been the response that came afterwards.
From the facebook status that claimed me as a guy’s hero of the day to the way that another one of the guys would always say hi to me in passing from that day forward, I had earned the respect of a bunch of 18-22 year old guys, which is quite a feat as a sixteen year old girl. I was on the list of people to invite to future battles and these guys ended up becoming the group of people I hang out with on campus. We go bowling and have coffee and when they’re at the restaurant when I’m working, they sometimes shoot me with nerf guns – it’s the stuff that makes college fun.
Being a girl who spends her weekends watching Doctor Who and crafting, I’m not the someone that gets much romantic attention from men. Instead, I’m the girl with a load of guy friends who I talk get to talk to about philosophy, rage comics, and geeky movies. They accept my mustache puns and indie fashion. They respect me and treat me like girls deserve to be treated.
You don’t have to compromise to makes friends with guys – even at a place like college. You simply have to find the right guys to spend time with and ignore the ones that are looking at you like meat. Being yourself actually works – nerf swords and all.